journal-07/09/99

07/09/99

sometimes i wonder if my life is too boring.

sometimes i'm convinced it is.

sometimes i think i work too hard and don't play hard enough. i think i'm not enjoying my time here on earth, because who knows what's next.

there's one thing i know for sure: right now i'm really not what you'd call centered. i'm floating and stumbling all over the place. i'm grasping for artifacts, holding on to things that i know are true and right, and i'm skeptical about everything else. i feel a little left out right now.

left out of what, i'm not sure.

just left out in general. if there is such a thing.

i want to write a book.

i don't know what about.

every attempt i've made at writing a book has ended after about 30 pages of nonsense and anarchy.

and stupid storylines.

i think about writing an autobiography sometimes... and i don't think that would have a stupid storyline.

at least i hope not!